According to the National Center on Domestic and Sexual Violence, abusers use eight power tactics to keep their victims under their control. While men and women can both be victims and abusers, the victim with be referred to as “she” and the abuser as “he” for clarification purposes only.
Anger and Emotional Abuse
The abuser will put his victim down, making the victim feel bad about herself or feel guilty about the situation. Name calling, mind games and humiliation are also used to break down the victim's self esteem.
Social Status
As part of the dominance factor of abuse, the abuser will treat the victim like a servant and will be the “one to define [the man's] and [woman's] roles” (NCDSV). In addition, the abuser will be the one who makes all the decisions, include those pertaining to the victim's life.
Intimidation
Intimidation is a large factor of emotional, physical and sexual abuse. The abuser will make the victim feel afraid by using intimidating looks, actions and gestures. For example, the abuser may smash objects and destroy property to get his intimidation message across to the victim. In addition, the abuser may also use a weapon or abuse a family pet to make the victim submit to him.
Denial
The abuser will deny that any abuse is occurring and may not taken any of the victim's concerns seriously. In addition, the abuser will place the blame solely on the victim, saying it is her fault that the abuse occurs.
Threats
A variety of threats are used by the abuser to keep his victim under his control. The abuser may just make threats, or he may carry them out. Threats may pertain to physical harm of the victim, or the abuser may threaten to leave or commit suicide. The abuser may also force the victim to perform illegal acts, and then threaten to report her to the police. If the victim has reported the abuse to the police, the abuser may threaten her until she drops the charges.
Sexual Coercion
As part of the abuse, the abuser may sexually coerce his victim. The abuser may manipulate, threaten or drug the victim to get sex. Children may also be a factor in sexual coercion: the abuser can get the victim pregnant and threaten to take the child away.
Isolation
Another factor in abuse is isolation, which can prevent the victim from seeking help. The abuser will control who the victim sees, talks to, reads and goes.
Peer Pressure
To keep the victim under his control, the abuser will threaten to spread rumors about the victim. This tactic is often used in teenage abuse relationships, where there is an abundance of peer pressure from high school.
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