Abuse

» justcathy63 - abuse denial?

I've been married for 15 years. Five years ago my husband and had a fight that escalated and he shoved me so hard I bounced into the kitchen cabinets. I was stunned. Worst part it was in front of my child (then 4 years old). I had bruises and fingerprint bruises under my arms.
We sleep in separate rooms going on 3 or 4 years (I've lost count). Over the years our fights have exploded and he shoves me up against a wall or put his hands around my neck and shakes me. He even shot out a window in our house with a gun and said, "The next bullet will be in his neck." Divorce is not an option with him.

I have threatened to call the police, packed my bags but I never go thru with it. I still have doubt that it really is bad, that it warrants leaving. Leaving is the scariest feeling ever and feel very lost. Is this really bad even to leave even though it doesn't happen on a daily basis?

scared

-- posted by justcathy63