Abuse

» mkwhitten88 - My husband is normally a very funny, outgoing person who is grea

My husband is normally a very funny, outgoing person who is great to be around, but sometimes, probably once every week or so, he turns into a monster. He acts like a spoiled brat who is used to getting his way, which I know is not true. For instance, if he is taking a nap, no one can make a sound in the house or he will get mad. I told him that is out of line. We have two teenagers and we can't be totally silent for him. He also gets upset if he doesn't have what he wants to eat in the house and will start making comments about how inadequate I am. I never seem to buy the right things and he always says that he is going to buy them himself and hide them from the rest of us. We have begun calling this his "dark moods" because in a way it is almost like living with someone who is bipolar. He gets upset at the smallest things and says that I "set him off". He also gets a strange look his eyes when he is acting this way. I don't know how to explain it. We have been married for almost 20 years and he has always done this. Now, though, our kids are 17 and 14 and they are noticing it as well. They see that this is not normal. His father was an alcoholic who was very verbally abusive. I told him once during a very bad time that I would not live like his mother did. I sometimes think that he is just acting what he used to see growing up. I have begged him over the years to go to counseling. But, he says nothing is wrong so he won't go. Now that my kids are seeing this behavior too, I know I am not crazy, but I don't want my kids to learn this too. We all love him very much, but I don't know how much more I can take. What do I do? I know I am not perfect by any means and I know that disagreements are normal, but this doesn't seem normal to me. How do I deal with this before I lose my mind?

-- posted by mkwhitten88