Abuse

» ajmsoul - How do I help a friend

Frustratedfriend,

I can appreciate your frustration and how much you care about your friend. Everyone has to make decisions for themselves. Perhaps she feels ashamed of telling you anything. Often it takes many times of beginning to reach out and then retreating - facing a problem and then denying a problem for a woman being abused to make change.

Change is difficult and stressful even when it is absolutely necessary.

The best thing you can do is try to understand and be willing to be supportive if and when your friend reaches out again.

In the meantime because you care you don't want to pressure her or alienate her. You want her to feel free to come to you for support without judgment or without the condition that she will be asked of confronted about whatever choices she does make or doesn't make.

You may want to try to continue to reach out to her but not about her situation - let her bring that up if and when she is ready. In the meantime you could try just nurturing the friendship with conversation about other things.

You can be a friend and a safe place but both will require patience.

Take care,
A.J.

-- posted by ajmsoul